Over a year....playing catch up...May 2015

It's been over a year since I updated. Wow. Time really does fly when you are having fun. My birthday was had, recently....almost to the end of my 40's, and blazing forward to see what happens next, being grateful for all I have. The last year has been pretty incredible. I have a bunch of travel stuff to catch up on. That's kind of a given. Heck, just this quarter has been amazing!

Last time I posted here was May 11, 2015....let's go over some highlights since then...

• In late May of last year, had a somewhat dream come true. I am a Black Rock Ranger. I also participate at the Morris Burner Hotel,and have created a Ranger-like group there called the Morris Guardians. We got to have a Ranger training at the Morris. It was worlds colliding in all the right ways.

•  Then, later that month, I got to have more Ranger goodness, by participating with a great group of people who train the Rangers. They had a retreat and I was invited and it was amazing and a great time with great people. There was camping and bacon and learnin' and a turkey who I both loved and felt guilt over every time I passed him, knowing he was bound for a Thanksgiving table...I thought he was very cute.
  
  
  
  
• Then through the amazing technology of modern 3-D ultrasound, I got to experience my future grandson
  
  
  
  
• And a birthday. There was a tap show at the Eldorado, similar to a "Stomp" type thing, and I wanted to go, with my girlfriends, for my birthday. It was very cool, and I felt very loved. Hooray for sisterhood! 
  
• Then, I got to take family and grand daughter to experience the joy of Sesame Street Live! as a patron and not the person in charge of ALL THE THINGS. This has been an on-going healing process in my quest to come to peace and reconcile the good and bad experienced while I was at Lawlor. Seeing the wonder if childhood in the eyes of a little is a truly amazing experience.
  

seasons change...

it's really only been in the last few days that fall seems to have arrived in the truckee meadows with finality. we had some rain, and it was cold for a little bit after (and DURING) the migration home from the playa, but then it warmed again and we were treated to near-idyllic days with cool/chilly mornings and warm days/afternoons...

Photo by Kristen, Ranger Social 2010

another year of burning man has passed, and a friend of mine, scotto, makes it a point to reflect after each burn and codify what lessons he learned. i think that's a pretty nifty idea, so here is what i learned from burning man 2010:

• sometimes less really is more, especially when it comes to working on the playa!
• always be willing to take advantage of opportunity when it knocks, sometimes wonderful things happen to good people.
• friends are the family you choose, and the importance of that family during vacation, survival in harsh desert environs and thru dust storms and drama is not to be undervalued.
• be good enough at what you do to realize your shortcomings and brave enough to let go when someone who CAN do what you were tasked to do comes along to take over. the importance of knowing when you've found your replacement is cannot be overstated.
• men look cute in tutu's also!
• b1rd's can do GREAT on the playa, if you care about them enough to give them adequate care and lots of love and attention. chickens? not so sure...
• some people should not give lap dances; some stuff just CANNOT be scrubbed from the retinas.
• massages on playa are sublime!
• double rainbows are ALWAYS the bomb!

Photo by Twita2005 on Flickr http://www.flickr.com/photos/twita/

i am pretty sure i've done this before, in another venue. if i find those posts, i may bring them here. not sure yet, as burning man is undeniably a part of my history.

i was going to write something about teaching SEED's in this post. this has been an amazing experience for me, so far. in many ways, i feel like i've failed my daughter for some of the rough times she went through, and i can't count the amount of time i've spent reparenting myself to correct wrongs of my past. adolescence is a traumatic and confusing time, and i wasn't sure how i'd respond to helping others through it...

Used under creative commons license. http://commons.wikimedia.org/wiki/File:Pomegranate_opened.jpg

i have become very attached to the seedlings in our program. they make me smile, i am awed by their grace, willingness to learn, their bravery and their ability to be candid. i can't wait to see where this year takes me!

that's what i am up to. it's time, at the time, to become introspective, as it always is when the wheel of my own persona year turns. i experience "new year" somewhere between the end of burning man and samhain =) my pagan heart says samhain, but so much of my year culminates at burning man, i think the older i get, the less absolutes i have in my world, the better =)

i've recently been participating in some "open to love pujas"....ceremonies given by a friend once a month at a local yoga studio where people learn to connect on many different levels. there's one thursday and man, am i looking forward to it. i have been feeling adrift and a tad sorry for myself of late. but never, NEVER so sorry that i would wish to be anyone but who i am, experiencing the life i have. my blessings are so great that i wonder every day at how lucky i am.

peace.

time flies, but is it fun?!?!

and many say, if it isn't fun, why do it?!? why, indeed =) last weekend, i spent my first weekend working for "high rock security". it was quite an interesting and fun experience. i got to work the "harmony festival", in santa rosa california. i got to spend the ride down with a good friend, and the ride home with a new friend. this was my little camping space, at our compound at harmony:

now, lest you not appreciate the enormity of this, let me just say it's probably been more than ten years since i've slept on the ground, so this was quite a challenge to me. we later had very nice RV's i got to sleep in the last night, but mostly, i wanted to stay in this tent to see if i could do it. i am happy to report that i could and i did, and with no sore muscles or aching old bodies, either. pretty decent for a chubby old lady =) here's our compound:

and finally, this was the harmony festival before thousands more than we saw friday descended on this urban hippy fest:

i will say only that i am inspired and amused at the various and sundry ways in which urban hippies will try to get out of paying for said urban hippy fest and still enjoy the festivities. it was an educational and amazing experience for me on a lot of different levels. soon, i shall be a california licensed security guard. i am not sure if i should feel proud of afraid =)

in the ensuing week, times are a-changing for me and mine. i am almost experiencing empty nest now. chris is in afghanistan, and looking forward to his liberty soon in columbia. it's a part of the world he's never seen before and neither have i. i can't wait to hear of his adventures. he's busy out living life, but i sure wish he was more cerebral in recording it...mostly so i can live vicariously through him...wishes for safe travels are definitely being sent his way....

about a week ago now, bri moved out again, too. i am very proud of her. she moved back down to where she lived before, with corey. this was her choice, and i think a good thing for her. sometimes i think it's good to shake people up and make sure they are still on their toes =) and in anticipation of our lives changing drastically due to dan's military retirement, we now have no one living in our house who isn't contributing financially. we couldn't do it anymore. there's a part of me that feels guilty about asking people to leave when i know they were depending on me to "take care of them"...but then another part of me feels colossally relieved, the atmosphere in my house seems much lighter, the house is LOADS cleaner, and in general, i feel very good about what has happened. other adults shouldn't have to take care of each other, except for the normal ebb and flow that occurs when partners lives change and evolve.

this weekend that just passed, was spent experiencing ranger love, in various forms. ranger training was attended, ranger friends not seen for awhile seen and loved up on, gifts given, gifts received, and a whole lot of goodness going on! i heart my khaki clan!

that's about it for the moment. just about a month to compression. holy crap!

peace!