hahaha...times, changing

I actually do never seem to catch up on some things =) I guess getting some stuff done sort of precipitates that other stuff will not get done. It's funny to me that I introduced the world to Dozer in the last post I did, and I just saw him again last night. Jerk! Here's a more recent pic:

Again, I can't believe how much has changed since my last post! Shortly after that, my sister moved to Sierraville, California, to follow a dream to help build sort of an artists community. That didn't work out for a variety of reasons, but she's trying to make the best of it and is currently living near her love in Davis, CA. I was there this last weekend for Ranger Training, and got to see her, her love, and Dozer. All three are doing well! I applaud Joy for wanting to make a way and a life for herself outside Reno. I know it's hard sis, but hang in there! Even if you come back to Reno, at least you will be able to have said that you did this!

My most exciting news is that I HAVE A NEW JOB!! This has been in the planning stages for me for a long time, but I didn't want to say anything because I was afraid to jinx myself if I put my intention too plainly out there, or seemed assy or over-confident about it before it happened. I also want to list here the reasons I've done this and what led me to this...

In 2001, I did not consider myself a traditionally creative human. I could appreciate art, but didn't really feel I was artistic or that I had cultivated that in myself. I vowed to change that. As my kids were getting older, they needed me less, wanted their independence more, which they were certainly entitled to, and I was left thinking to myself that if I did not build a life for myself, I would be sad and lonely when they made their way into their own existences by not having anything to do or anyone to hang out with or do things with. I was actualizing SOME creativity in the form of Pagan ritual and worship, teaching that to youth through the Unitarian Fellowship in Reno, and making and teaching activities for that group, but felt pretty unappreciated and isolated in those pursuits.

Backing up to late 2000, I don't remember how I stumbled upon it, but late in the Summer of 2000, I stumbled upon a Burning Man web site. I started reading, I followed some links to other links, and was completely captivated. I found out that someone I used to be related to through marriage had gone to this thing several times. It was too late that year for us to pull off a trip to Burning Man, but I vowed that I would go the next year come hell or high water and that I would spend that intervening year learning everything I could about Burning Man so that I would have an awesome time when I went. And that's pretty much what I did...

Since that time, I can't even express how amazing my life has been. Burning Man was an amazing experience, but my first couple of years I remember myself thinking "All these people are so creative, I wish I could be creative like that..." Our second year at Burning Man was the "Floating World" year. It was a great year for us personally, we saw and wandered all over the city and filled a passport with interesting and fun things we went around and did. During this process, we met a guy who was a "Ranger", his name is "Sasquatch" and he Rangers still. This gave us the impetus to give back to the community and also Ranger. By virtue of my involvement with Rangers, I began by being a perimeter guard for the local Fire Performance group, called Controlled Burn. I safety'd for them for about a year before I picked up some tools and decided to try for myself. Also around this time, a good friend of mine dared me to take a belly dancing class with her, which I did. I am sad because I am the only one of that group of women who all started on a dare who still dances, but I have never looked back and I cannot even express the ways in which belly dancing and fire dancing have enhanced my life.

As time has passed, I've done more and interesting things. I helped co-produce a festival called the "Drum, Dance and Didgerido Festival" the last two years it ran, then I took my hand at my own event, now in it's fifth year, called "Compression! Art and Fire!". I've taken a "Welding of Art" class, and tried forms of dance and performance I would never have tried before I started this wild ride! All these things have brought more magic, more creativity into my life. BUT, I still had my old, non-creative job sitting behind a desk.

Earlier this year, I was told of a possible opportunity that may come up, working with events full-time, but still on my college campus, which would keep all my benefits and retirement in the same place. I waited and waited and waited, but finally the position was posted! I had to think long and hard about taking this job, because it would be a HUGE change for me. No more behind a desk (ask much as I was before), potentially having to work nights and weekends, being here when events happen, more stress, more accountability. Ultimately, I decided to go for it. I had felt stagnant at my other job for awhile, but very safe and secure.

I GOT THE JOB! Today marks the beginning of my third week, and so far, it's a dream come true for me. Every day, I get validation that this was the right move for me. So many things have gone right, the amount of serendipity in my life is beyond measure and an amazing thing. I love my life! I know there are tough times ahead, but for this moment, I am reveling in the newness, the excitement, the potential, and welcoming the perpetual creativity into my life!

~Peace.

Never seem to catch up....

This was one of my Bro's last hospital trips, October, 2011

I guess that's the sign of a busy person eh? Not sure whether to be happy or not about that =) Generally, I am happy, but sometimes, it all just wears on me.

And then, there are days like today where almost all projects seem caught up, and reflection appears to be my friend, and I can take the time to jot down some thoughts. SO MUCH EXPERIENCE to record!

As I get ready to start posting about this years Compression, it strikes me that I haven't even recorded here my experience from last year's event. Pretty sure I have that written somewhere, so I will transfer it here.

Most recently, there have good times and sad times. My brother Steve passed away on April 18 after a long battle with Cancer. I will just say here, Cancer sucks. Really badly. I got to be there for him in his final weeks and this made me happy, but I am sorry for his pain, I am sorry he is gone, and I won't have him around anymore. We were not always close but we did love each other. Now, I must go, but I will edit and finish this later....I love you Stevie!

Still behind....

and wow, i did not realize the last time i had posted was on the anniversary of my mom's death. i opened the page today and went "whoah". sad sad sad. i still miss her every single day of my life! there's other family going through some stuff right now, i hope it all gets worked out...

me? i am pretty chill right now. there are new things on the horizon for me, i hope, and life is good. being busy is awesome, but also exhausting.

not that i often find myself being resolute about anything, but i did make a commitment this year to being more mindful of living a healthy lifestyle, and of health in general and mind in specific. i'd been feeling sort of crappy, so a couple of days after the post about my mom, i decided to join a gym. a friend took me and i really liked the atmosphere, classes and people. it's been almost two months now and i'm still going strong. i am there about five to six days a week, depending on the work schedules and am feeling a definite improvement in my cardio health. quicker recovery, stuff like that. it's been very interesting trying to be mindful of health again. i am ashamed to say that it's been a long time since i've been in good cardio health, i think maybe we don't realize how sedentary we are until we aren't anymore, or we start the process to change all that. it's different for me, and my experiences are different. it's like i am learning my body all over again, and what it feels like to be winded, have my heart rate in the "target zone". i remember it being harder and perhaps that's where my somewhat fitness level came in from dancing the last several years. i am four weeks into a six week program to jump start my new goals, and it's been a lot of fun. i am enjoying myself, which is something i didn't think i would say much about exercise. there are several dance-centered cardio things i do, plus weights and stuff in a pool. i like it! go, me!

in that same vein, i'd been feeling a little "off" around the holidays and thought maybe the 'ole diabetes had finally caught up with me. it's true, it had. i hadn't been to a doc in a couple of years, and my sugars are now consistently high. that means it's time to start testing, so i signed up for a diabetes education class and got a monitor, and have been testing twice a day. that's interesting, and i am also keeping track of my blood pressure. it all sort of goes together, but there's other stuff i need to change. i am okay with that because i want to live a long, long time, i think.

that's the daily update. this morning, there is snow outside, maybe only the third snowfall of the winter, so we desperately need the water resources. it's still snowing =) this last weekend i worked the state basketball championship tournament and it was fun, but long, sort of boring days. some of the games were good, though, and it made me feel good to be able to make the experience something to remember for those high school kids. i hope they do =)

had a long talk with my son yesterday, who is now in germany and loving life. there is a part of me that is jealous, but i wouldn't trade places with him. we will be visiting them in june of 2013.

there is also a new kitten in the house, and he's pretty cute. his name is dozer and he is full of kitty energy. here he is with grizzly:

World, meet dozer:

have a great monday!

peace....