No one really reads this one. I think that's a good thing.
Today I am processing. Today, there is grief.
My country chose a racist, misogynist, megalomaniac to lead our country for the next four years.
The last year has been really, really good for me. I have learned things I didn't know I needed to learn, and I had more peace in my life than I've ever had. If there has been a theme, I suppose it has to have been acceptance. Maybe looking for the lessons?
I think there will be another post for the rest of this year. Right now, here, I am processing, and looking for a way forward. I know what that way is. In uncertainty, we control the things we can.
- I will pay off as much of my debt as I can before this administration leaves
- I will focus as many of my resources as possible on working on and completing the off-grid compound.
- I will make comprehensive materials lists and anything that needs to be purchased from China, we will buy it now before any tariff's can come in to play.
- I will work towards divesting myself from the dystopian nightmare
And yet, even my angst has so much privilege in it. This came across my feed this morning, and it's absolutely true:
From Nishant Shah:
“As somebody who has lived in, negotiated with, been persecuted by authoritarian governments, here are four things to set as a reminder against the onset of despair; remembering over and over again that despair is the privilege of those who can afford it.
1. An election is only one of the many ways by which care is organised and managed. If the electoral mandate goes against your own, it doesn't mean that there is no way forward. It merely means that a rights-based, process driven, formal approach has been blocked but there are always avenues through which things you care about can be mobilised.
2. You have not lost. Elections might appear as competitions but we need to change that narrative. Elections are about seeing what a majority (however flawed that concept might be) believes is the right way of governing collectively. If you do not align with this majority, it doesn't mean that you have lost. It means that you have work to do, to make sure that you work together for things that are important for you and for them.
3. If you feel that the system has failed you, remember that systems have always failed people. If you feel it is happening to you for the first time, it means that you have had privilege which is for the first time being threatened. If you always felt that you were attacked by the system, know that people before you have lived through this, thrived, and found other ways of finding care. If all of us took the time to process our emotions towards caring for others, it will develop its own momentum.
4. You are not alone. This is no unique. It is not exceptional. Your narrative of what your country or people believe in and stand for, might have been challenged but this has happened before. To many others. Reach out. Within and outside, for others who share your experience and your grief. We will hold you while you figure out the next steps, but you are not alone.
My heart is with the people who are going to be severely and disproportionately impacted by the new mandate of the US elections. My head is with the people who I trust and know will make the changes to ensure the protections of those who will be most affected. My head and heart are with everybody who realises what a global shift this is going to be, but how it also marks another milestone in the swing towards futures that we dread.”
I just keep thinking, with the above, of my black friends and them shaking their heads at us, or my Native friends who are like, "Yeah, Americans lie and they don't know how to keep their agreements. And yet, we hope for better...."
I don't know what we deserve anymore. Maybe we deserve nothing. Maybe we deserve what we get the next four years....
There is no Peace.
