i am at that point where i am feeling exceedingly blessed in and for my life.
spirituality has been something that, while not really lacking in my life, had been less prevalent than at other times in the past. i thought around samhain time "gee, i used to put a tremendous amount of energy into creating and putting on these elaborate rituals to help many people celebrate the solstice’s, now i do none of that…" this is true, but i also do things that bring people happiness (i hope) and joy on a more regular basis, and it’s all people, not just pagan people =) i mean, of course, the difference between fire performing and being an active pagan. the pagan beliefs have never gone away, they are just not practiced as intentionally or with as much purpose as in the past. in many ways this makes me happy, because what i am doing now is more physically active, and i enjoy it a TON. at any rate, the dichotomy had occurred to me periodically over the years, so i thought i would mention it =)
on wednesday of last week, my nephew came home from georgia for two weeks on leave from the army. i’ve been very domestic lately, cooking all his favorite foods and making sure he feels welcome and loved while he’s home. he’s enjoying things pretty well, i think =)
last week, at some point, i got an email from someone who is a casual friend, but not someone i know overly well. his son participates in our fire group, and he is recently divorced. he invited me to a solstice celebration at his house. i had previously been invited to a bar crawl, that i had thought of attending, but i am just SO not a bar person, normally. this was so much more in line with my values and what i wanted to do, i made a mental note to do so, knowing that i also had to go earlier in the day to a cookie exchange, which i knew would also be fun.
in essence, my solstice was perfect.
it started with the cookie exchange. i went boring and did snickerdoodles, but they are a good cookie and super easy to make, so that made life super good. the cool thing about the cookie exchange is that it was with friends that i made while being involved in the aforementioned pagan stuff, so it was like spending solstice eve as i have on several other occassions, sharing food, wine, and good conversation with good friends of a like mind. bliss. i stayed later than everyone else to visit with my friends i hadn’t been able to connect with for awhile, and timed it just perfectly so that i was heading south at exactly the right time to catch the solstice party.
i think it’s sometimes good to be around people you don’t know well. it forces you to remember what it’s like to be "the new person" and also allows you to interact with people you might not otherwise, if your friends were there. i did get to spend a decent amount of time with some folks also from the fire group who also showed up, getting to know them a bit better. i wasn’t sure, honestly, if i was going to last until midnight, when the invitation had said we would toast the welcoming of the sun again, and longer days. man, am i ready for longer days….i didn’t think it would ever get here! it’s especially poignant because it’s been really cold here lately, like bone-chilling, less than 10 degrees cold. burrr.
so this guy was having a solstice party, but he hadn’t heard many of the stories associated with the celebration of the solstice, so i was able to share some of this knowledge with him, which felt good…and right. some more people were exposed to religion that predates christianity! yay, for open-minds and open hearts!
sunday dawned clear and chilly, but it was going to be a good cooking day for me. i had promised my nephew mexican food and had done some of the prep work for it, but then gotten distracted by cookie making and put the prepared ingredients away, so sunday is generally a day i cook and have not a lot else to do, and so it was.
just as i was putting the finishing touches on dinner, my cell phone rang and it was that girl i have mentioned before. the one who likes to play around with me and kiss me when she’s drinking, but otherwise seems hot and cold (pun intended hehehe). things have changed between us. i appreciate her in my life, and honestly, i think she needs my friendship the most at this point in her life. she’s seeing a very nice man, and seems happy. i see her pretty often, and with her, i definitely think friendship is the safest course. at any rate, she called to say that she was having a small, private solstice celebration and she’d like me to be a part of it. I told her i’d be there and i went. she doesn’t live that far from me…
the ceremony was great. what we did was write down 5 things that we wanted to get rid of in our lives and 5 things we wanted to accept, grow, or harvest in our lives. then we shared the things we wanted to purge before throwing the pieces of paper in a fire that was in the back yard, then came inside, sat around a table and shared the five things we wanted to grow before placing them in a jar, to be buried with fertilizer tomorrow and buried, so they can "grow" this year. after the smallish ritual, we went christmas caroling! it was a lot of fun, and i feel like my holiday was perfect.
have any of you, with kids or on your own, ever played the game for x-box of wii called "rock band"? that is the FUNNEST game..we giggled for hours the other night, the kids and i, singing those songs and trying to figure things out.
today, is a great day, and i am SO ready for the days to begin to be longer.
here’s hoping everyone has awesome holidays!
peace….soon =)
